December 2011
k1mkardashian:
i think it’ll be funny if beyonce’s baby has no talent whatsoever but then again it doesn’t really need it lol
kimjongilluminati:
i wish i had fake police lights so i could pull over hot people and be like “hello um you’re in violation of code 12.467.346 give me your number”
africans:
yo mama’s so fat that she took a look at her life and realized she wanted a change so she joined a dieting group and started eating better and exercising more and she got down to her goal weight and now looks and feels better than ever and its very inspirational good for her
me: *walks in a starbucks*
clerk: hello how can i hlep u
me: i want a starbucks
clerk: ok sure these are the different kinds of coff-
me: NO
me: I
me: WANT
me: A
me: STARBUCKS
me: THE
me: WHOLE
me: BUILDING
africans:
excuse me but i lost family in the war of 1812 and yea im offended
ericwhoreman:
basedgodzilla:
smells-like-girl:
if you’re going to pose with an instrument in a photo at least hold it correctly
my guitar needs a new mouthpiece
my violin is out of tune!!!!!!
me: hmm i have a slight pain i think i'll look this up on webmd
webmd: you have cancer
me: ok
womb-raider:
neville from icarly is my spirit animal
me: hey what's up
vegetarian: i'm a vegetarian
me: hey whats up
AP student: ugh i have so much homework i'm in AP and it's such a hard class why did i take AP i hate all these hard tests and my AP teacher is so strict like more strict than your teacher. no my class is so much harder than yours you don't even know what AP is like
overplayed:
If Adele can make a career out of complaining about her life then so can I
gigolosanonymous:
realizing what you deserve vs. the shit you put up with
